The Battle for Mommy

My cat hates my dog. My cat has hated my dog since the day the dog entered the house. I thought that someday the cat might like the dog. I was wrong. My cat takes great pleasure in tormenting my dog. He plops himself at the top of the stairs, so the dog can’t get into my office. Instead the dog lays on the ground, right by the cat and cries. The cat(s) rule the house, the dog is a wimp. Every night it’s the same thing. Battle for mommy. Battle to get into the office to see mommy. It’s gotten so bad, the dog won’t go downstairs unless he’s taken, as he knows he won’t be able to get back into the office to be with mommy. The cat, laughs his cat like laugh, and the dog cries and cries. Does the cat do it on purpose? Damn straight he does. He only does it when no ones looking, then when he notices someone paying attention, he acts like “what, what, I wasn’t doing anything but laying here. The dog’s dumb, love me, pet me, give me treats”. The dog, continues to cry.

You can just hear the dialogue

“Go ahead dog, try and get into the office, I won’t hurt you”

“What? What are you so afraid of? I’ll only chase you, scratch you, bite your tail and make you cry”

“And this is why they say, cats rule and dogs drool. Dumbass dog!”

“Oh hi mom, nope, we’re just hanging out together! I wasn’t doing anything, nope, not me. I’m a good cat, the dog though, he’s kinda stupid. What? Nooo, I wasn’t tormenting the dog. We’re just catching up, yep, like old friends. Right dog? RIGHT DOG! Yep, I love the dog, and I love my mom. Can I have a treat mom? Maybe go outside, and how about letting me scratch under the bed, I love that! Mumble mumble keep your mouth shut dog, I know where you sleep mumble mumble”

How did I end up with animals like this?

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